Saturday, June 27, 2009

The last 2 weeks in photo journal format.

A good portion of my time is spent here. This is the view from my favorite rock. I often go to this spot with my bible, journal and Ipod and spend some quality time with the Lord.
I've also been spending a good amount of time with this lady. She works at The Bridge and she is lovingly referred to as my "peterborough mom". We often eat lunch together in the park across from the office. She's a wonderful woman and a beautiful friend. 
My dear Robyn turned 17 this week and we threw a little birthday party for her down at the Silver Bean Cafe. 
My sister, her husband (not pictured- that guy is steve), and her 2 crazy adorable kids, Ava and Carter, came to visit for 2 days. It was exhausting and so much fun. My lovely roommate Tori came back to town (she goes home in the summers) to hang out for a night and her and I, along with a bunch of friends, got all fancied up and went to the Distillery District in Toronto. It was a great night. 

These last 2 weeks have been crazy busy. The end of my summer semester is near, my last exam is 9am on monday and I'm in the midst of studying. Its for pharmacology- a class i absolutely love! Yesterday some friends and I went to this old rock quarry near town and spent the afternoon swimming and exploring and having a blast. Have i mentioned lately that I love my life here?

Last night was The Bridge and I'm now a 'supervisor'! Exciting stuff! That's all for now. Peace. 

Rachel- Email me info about your wedding already!

Death Bed- Reliant K.

I can smell the death on the sheets
Covering me
I can't believe this is the end

But this is my deathbed
I lie here alone
If I close my eyes tonight
I know I'll be home

The year was nineteen forty one
I was eight years old and
Far far too young
To know that the stories
Of battles and glory
Was a tale a kind mother
Made up for her son
You see
Dad was a traveling preacher
Teaching the words of the Teacher
But mother had sworn
Went off to the war
And died there with honor
Somewhere on a beach there
But he left once to never return
Which taught me that I should unlearn
Whatever I thought a father should be
I abandoned that thought
Like he abandoned me

By forty seven I was fourteen
I'd acquired a taste for liquor and nicotine
I smoked until I threw up
Yet I still lit 'em up for thirty more years
Like a machine

So right there you have it
That one filthy habit
Is what got me where I am today

I can smell the death on the sheets
Covering me
I can't believe this is the end
I can hear those sad memories
Still haunting me
So many things
I'd do again

But this is my deathbed
I lie here alone
If I close my eyes tonight
I know I'll be home

I got married on my twenty first
Eight months before my wife would give birth
It's easier to be sure you love someone
When her father inquires with the barrel of a gun
The union was far from harmonious
No two people could have been more alone than us
The years would go by and she'd love someone else
And I realized I hadn't been loved yet myself

And there's your typical spiel
Yeah if life was a highway
I was drunk at the wheel
I was helping the loose ends
All fall apart
Yeah I swear I was destined to fail
And fail from the start

I bowled about six times a week

The bottle of Beam kept the memories from me
The marriage had taken a seven-ten split
Along with my pride the ex-wife took the kids

I can smell the death on the sheets
Covering me
I can't believe this is the end
I can hear those sad memories
Still haunting me
So many things
I'd do again

But this is my deathbed
I lie here alone
If I close my eyes tonight
I know I'll be home

I was so scared of Jesus
But He sought me out
Like the cancer in my lungs
That's killing me now
And I've given up hope
On the days I have left
But I cling to the hope
Of my life in the next
Then Jesus showed up
Said "Before we go"
"I thought that we might reminisce"
"See one night in your life"
"When you turned out the light"
"You asked for and prayed for my forgiveness"

You cried wolf
The tears they soaked your fur
The blood dripped from your fangs
You said, "What have I done?"
You loved that lamb
With every sinful bone
And there you wept alone
Your heart was so contrite

You said, "Jesus, please forgive me of my crimes
Sanctify this withered heart of mine
Stay with me until my life is through
And on that day please take me home with you"

I can smell the death on the sheets
Covering me
I can't believe this is the end
I can hear You whisper to me,
"It's time to leave
You'll never be lonely again"

But this was my deathbed
I died there alone
When I closed my eyes tonight
You carried me home

[Jon Foreman of Switchfoot sings, as the voice of Jesus:]
I am the Way
Follow Me
And take My hand
And I am the Truth
Embrace Me and you'll understand
And I am the Light
And for Me you'll live again
For I am Love
I am Love
I, I am Love 

Monday, June 15, 2009

Rachel's Big News

My beautiful friend Rachel.....
 commented that she has big news to tell me. Due to the fact that I can't find her or Arielle's phone number, I'm dedicating this post to her big news. 

I'm thinking 2 things could be the big news. The first, is that Ellen invited Air and Rach to her show to hang out and talk about their awesome times experiences in Uganda.
Ellen was a HUGE support to the three of us.....
... while we were there. Ellen was always there to lift our spirits and was always the first one to suggest we dance our stresses out. She even had her own room which she kindly let Air and Rach store the bags and bags of shoes these 2 awesome girls collected to bring to Uganda. Ellen even let Rach borrow her air cast shoes! She's so generous!

Now for the big news.  I've always known Rachel to a touch fanatical about the rennisance period. And I know for a FACT that were her and her wonderful boyfriend Napthali to get engaged she would have a themed wedding. After all... who doesn't LOVE theme weddings right?
I've been told I look phenomenal in crushed velvet and as a bridesmaid (RIGHT RACH?!) I'll pull off the classic, floor length, long sleeve excellently. 

Rach. If i'm right and I have a feeling I am....the three of us....
... are going to experience the best reunion.....
the world has ever seen.....
It's going to be so fantastic that we'll have to eat chicken with this guy again. 
My dear Rach. I am SO happy for you and Nap and I cannot WAIT to be with you when you guys start your life together. 

Now tell me if i'm right or if i need to delete this post. 

Saturday, June 13, 2009


I saw a c-section at clinical on friday. It was intense. I had no idea the beating a woman's body takes during that whole crazy process. My baby fever has officially been cured. 

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

The only way out.

I've been going strong for almost 10 months now. School is beating the life out of me and I'm desperate for a break. With 2 weeks till my exams start I'm beginning to fall apart. I'm over tired, way to stressed, overwhelmed and emotional beyond belief. Basically I'm a joy to be around right now.... wait. That should actually read "I'm annoying and miserable and snap at the drop of a hat." Ya- thats better. But don't worry. This post isn't a pity party. Its a swift kick in the pants for myself... which is exactly what I need.

I went to The Bridge to pick up the chapter that we're discussing from The Calvary Road today at this womens group I go to. The chapter is about revival in the home and as I read it after I had screamed into my pillow for a good while and cried and cried on the phone with my mom while desperately trying to finish a paper on cerebral vascular accidents (thrilling!) I thought there was nothing in it for me. Nope. Not one thing. In fact, I decided I was much too tired and much to upset to read my bible and journal like I normally do before sleep.

This morning I woke up early to catch the early bus to school. When i looked at my watch after a good while of waiting at the stop, it read 8:12am. Great. I got up early, got to the stop early, and still somehow missed the bus. So i waited till the 8:30 rolled around. In the meantime I took out the chapter and began reading it again.

"All the things that come between us and others, come between us and God and spoil our fellowship with Him, so that are hearts are not overflowing with the Divine Life."..... Dang. I guess what explains why I didn't want to pick up my bible because I was too angry at the guy I was writing this paper with.

"We think know best, we want our way and we nag or boss the other one; and nagging or bossing leads to the tendency to despise the other one." ...... Um... I guess thats why I was screaming at my computer. My way IS the best though... isn't it?!

"Now the question is, do i want new life, revival in my home? I have got to challenge my heart about this. Am i prepared to continue in this state or am I really hungry for new life, His life in my home?" .........For sure I do. I mean... thats what I've been saying this whole time. I guess i just haven't been acting like it.

"Again and again we will see places where we must yield up our rights, as Jesus yielded up His for us. We shall have to see that the thing in us that reacts so sharply to another's selfishness and pride, is simply our own selfishness and pride, which we are unwilling to sacrifice. " It was at this point in reading that I got it.

I am SO selfish. If something isn't done MY way, there is no way it could possibly be done right. This paper I had to write with another student for example... nothing was good enough. I got so so so worked up over a dumb paper that it actually ruined my night and my mom's because I was on the phone with her a good part of the evening (sorry ma!). My bad attitude and my impatience effected the quality of work I did and effected my partner's too. Who wants to work with someone who is unreasonable and bossy? Not me! But I defintely was that person last night.

"As we bow the neck at the Cross, His self-forgetful love for others, His longsuffering, and forbearance flow into our hearts. The precious Blood cleanses us from the unlove and illwill and the Holy Spirit fills us with the very nature of Jesus."

I wish there was a word that meant more than THANK YOU. Because if there was, thats what I'd be saying to the Lord right now. I'm a mess but I'm so thankful and grateful that the Lord I serve is a pro a cleaning up messes.... and making those messes into something beautiful. Now if you'll excuse me... I have some hardcore apologizing to do.